Okay good hustle this week guys. Some real blue-sky thinking.

Now it’s the close of play we can get all our ducks in a row and drill down to why this paradigm shift is so integral to leveraging the core competency of each vertical, whilst actioning key learnings.

Just circling back on this with a heads-up, have we run this all the way up the flag-pole yet? Going forward it would be to wise to pivot towards eating the elephant one bite at a time.

It’s a game-changer, I feel it in my very marrow. Great. As I said before, pre-revenue is looking baked-in so let’s not marinate too long, so why don’t we take a break by looking at some stupid crap on the internet for 10 minutes? Great.

Taking stock

Ah stock photography, you’re as hilarious as you are patronising and offensive (see: women laughing alone with salad) and corporate based stock photography occupies a particularly cringe-worthy space between “ha look at those losers in suits high-fiving” and “God I hope I don’t look like that”.

The makers of upcoming Vince Vaughn comedy Unfinished Business came up with a unique way to market its film using a free Getty image gallery of sterile stock photography using the stars of the movie.

Results are mixed, clearly Vaughn has a similar philosophy to turning up to photo-shoots as he does putting any effort into a performance, but still, these are free and we won’t get issued an invoice if we use them, so prepare for our next 12 months worth of marketing budget reports to be illustrated using James Franco’s little brother.

Update!

Adweek has revealed the original photography used in the Photoshopped images above…

I’d take back the comment I made about Vince Vaughn, but once you’ve seen The Internship you will never feel joy again.

Kanye West’s craziest quotes

Kanye West may say a lot of crazy stuff but there’s one thing you can’t deny, every time Kanye West opens his mouth it’s never less than hugely entertaining.

So let’s celebrate Yeezy’s ceaseless cavalcade of bullshit with a selection of 14 of Kanye West’s most bizarre quotes you’ve never heard before (because they’re made up by me).

The Mutant Tenenbaums

If what we found most entertaining on the internet was distilled down to its purest form…

Brick to the Future

If everything else we found entertaining on the internet was distilled further down to an even purer form…

50 Shades of Hutt

Then finally after all the things we found entertaining on the internet were completely exhausted, all we had left to distill was some pocket lint and an old smutty paperback…

Reductress

Comedians Sarah Pappalardo and Beth Newell created Reductress in 2013 and criminally I’ve only just discovered it this week.

The mission of Reductress is to take on the outdated perspectives and condescending tone of popular media aimed at women with the similar cynical and satirical edge of The Onion. It’s also funny as hell.

Googlifier

I can’t think of a better use of my time this afternoon then using the Googly Eyes Chrome app to create humiliating pictures of various scoundrels and villains around the internet.

You can even try it on your own company website… Looking good team!

Why no picture of yours truly? Well much like all enigmatic writers and vampires my image cannot be captured by digital photography…

I should probably update my LinkedIn with this.

I break internets

Speaking of breaking websites, I don’t know if anybody else noticed but I accidentally uploaded an Animal Gif image into the wrong place in our CMS last Friday afternoon, which caused our site’s mega-nav to do this for a short while…

Sorry about that.

The Oscar for most squirm-inducing performance goes to…

The only thing that Neil Patrick Harris could have done worse than his rather flat and desperate Oscar hosting gig last week was just come out on stage, freeze completely not say a word. Just imagine if he’d done that? Oh wait you don’t have to…

Total Eclipse of the Heart: deconstructed and made even more awesome if that’s possible

Learn masses about song structure and the sheer artful beauty that went into the creation of the Bonnie Tyler classic in this 30min (yes, stick with it) video created by genial singer-songwriter Aaron Wilde.

We’re living in a powder keg and giving off sparks!

“So wonderfully wonderfully wonderfully wonderfully pretty”

They’ve made music for cats. It’s horrible. It sounds like a mixture of Sigur Ros, the scary wailing chorus from 2001: a Space Odyssey and a cat orgy.

Click the image below for the ‘scientific explanation’ and a clip of the music.

And because I have to justify spending the last hour looking up pictures of kittens with guitars, here’s a whole bunch of kittens with guitars…

Play us out kitty!

There, that’s better isn’t it.

If that wasn’t quite enough internet tomfoolery, check out last week’s round-up right here: 10 best things on the internet: celebrating net neutrality edition.