I’ll think of a suitable word once I’ve finished collecting this week’s round-up of entertainments from the internet.

Sure, this collection probably will be magnificent, glorious or mind-blowing, there’s a high probability of it.

It might not be though. It could instead be Earth-shattering, sweat-inducing or eye-popping. It’s dangerous for me to even speculate right now, so instead I will leave the emotionally manipulative description until after we’re done. I wouldn’t want to disappoint you or lead you astray. 

Here’s the round-up:

Eat, drink and be Murray

I’ve only just learnt today that Bill Murray and Brian Doyle Murray hold an annual Caddyshack Charity Golf Tournament. It’s happening right now, this weekend! I have now finally realised my life’s ambition. It’s to go play golf with Bill Murray while he wears these trousers…

Now walk away slowly while staring at the ground

Things going well for you? Put paid to that brief fiction with this instant sad violin.

Trouble at the Wellsprings Foundation

Final True Detective reference I promise. At least for this year. Key scenes from the latest “oh God you gotta watch this show” show have been recreated as wholesome Hardy Boy adventures.

I’ll take ten of each!

Based on an article called ‘This is a generic brand video” written for McSweeney’s, this video created by Dissolve and made entirely out of its own stock footage is as glorious and manipulative as it is vague and meaningless.

Upworthy Editor Actually Writes Something and You Won’t Believe Who Takes Notice!

Whilst wandering around the McSweeney’s website I also spotted this brilliant article called Confessions of an Upworthy Editor. It’s as sly as it is damning:

Super scary tornado footage and thrash metal together at last!

This is genuinely an incredible and terrifying watch that WILL melt your face clean off. Careful now.

A perfect combination, neither should now be enjoyed without the other.

Yes, apparently this is a ‘thing’

From the makers of Lionel Richie’s gigantic inflatable head comes… LASER CAT!

When complete he will fire artwork out of his eyes at the moon with lasers.

The award for best dad ever goes to…

This guy makes short films of his son and adds special effects to make him look a like an action hero, displaying the three most important traits a father can have: technical skills, a love of Star Wars and recklessness.

I… uh… wow… you shouldn’t have… really

Because they know he likes basketball and life-size biscuit replicas of himself, Belgium has made the visiting US president his very own gigantic Obama cookie.

I wonder if he’ll start with the head.

I couldn’t imagine anything worse than a cookie of my own body… oh wait…

You really, really, honestly shouldn’t have

Just no.

Pedant’s corner

This week is home to TheShiznit and its glorious and comprehensive takedown of the new X-Men poster. SKY DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY! Click below:

It’s the “You’ve Got Mail” guy

He’s real, he’s alive and he’s just been uncovered by comedian Jim Breuer.

The greatest record collection in the world is in Hong Kong

Consequence of Sound published this fantastic article about the Yoda of the global record collecting community. Click below:

That’s about all the ones I know too

This child was asked by a similarly reckless dad to list all of the swear words he knows. The results are perhaps unsurprising.

And on that scatological note, we bid you adieu. Me and the internet are off flat-hunting this afternoon. Yes, we have finally taken the next step. We’ll forward our address on to you as soon as we’re settled. Although we probably won’t have the broadband sorted for a while.

For more internet round-up hijinks, read last week’s 10 magnificent things we found on the internet this week.