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11 spectacular ways the internet helped kill time this week

Despite last week’s machinations, I’ve given up on trying to keep this weekly round-up of amusing internet things ‘evergreen’. 

So prepare for a topical assault of Flappy Bird, Sochi, Valentine’s Day, The Lego Movie and flood misery, rendering the future readability of this article as redundant and confusing as a two year-old repeat of Have I Got New For You.

If you do have any questions at the end, me and internet will be holding a Reddit AMA later on this afternoon. Only we’ll be using the pseudonym Jennifer Lawrence.